Monday, January 29, 2007

Wait and Waiting

It's been hard to sit here and wait - it's been 5 months... I know something "big" is brewing for the future - but I can't see it, and touch it, but I crave it .

I kinda feel lost, happy, sad, crazily happy and peaceful all at once.

It's all so bizarre.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Oh my Buddha!

It's a phrase that the Khmers used alot - but it's true for the moment...
I am thinking about making the switch to fair trade tea - it's a very complicated move because it's usually the only drink that I have at people's home and on the road.

It took me over 2 years to fully make the move from regular coffee to fair trade and my time at Oxfam cemented it into my bones. Back in the day I would finish those old second cup cards in about 2 weeks - now second cup is my sanctuary for peppermint tea...

Now where would I go?

I need to think about this more carefully - even though my heart is telling me to "just do it"

oh.

nite
jam

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Children of Men

I took my sister to see this movie last nite and during the final moments I started to cry... Everything was so overwhelming...the 9 minute long "gears of war" steadi-cam shots, subtle religious imagery, massive choreography, good acting and the creepy mellow soundtrack.

The funny thing is that last nite was the 2nd time I watched the movie - CDM and I saw it on Monday and during it I was sitting on the edge of my seat wondering...
"What is this!!!...I can't process all this stuff at once!!"

Well watching it the 2nd time definitely added a live theatre experience. I felt completely immensed in the movie.

Definitely Figgis [I blame you for my 24 addiction and for 24 itself..] and Russian Ark inspired - Dan see this!

Jam

Listening to > "Losing my way"
Justin Timberlake

Friday, January 19, 2007

Brother Siste' day Today!

My sister and I took sometime off work today to hang out
And the weather is perfect to go skating @ Nathan Phillips Square and
then hang out with some old fashion hot chocolate...

I love my sister and I am so excited to spend the rest of the day with her :>

BTW>> My hard core travellor camel race friend came to my place last
nite to catch up and well he was quite astonished of the
simplicity/shambles of it all - i was kinda speechless for a bit...

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

bizarre morning ride

I was running extremely late for an important meeting this morning and
had to suck up the no other option but to take a cab. I was a bit
frantic and trying my best to collect my thoughts and jumped into the
first cab I saw...only to be shocked..

My driver was an old Chinese man
-who was listening to Elvis
- and the cab smelt like heavy pot
- to top that off he was driving with one hand
- and had a tamborine in the other hand [with a sticker "I love hooters" ]

I told him I need to get to Union station in a hurry and I had 10 mins
- he looked at his watch and camly said - "you will be there in 7
minutes - listen to some elvis and here is my tamborine - shake it..."

So I took the tamborine and started to play it - while getting a
history lesson from him on elvis... I felt stangely calm within
seconds..

My talk with him got really really insightful and strange after ....
infact too insightful and strange - still debriefing it in my head.

But before I left he showed me a picture of his son - and it was a
picture of Jesus.

This man brought a big smile to my face for a good chunk of the
morning - I really felt like I was in Cambodia again...

Bizarre moment I wouldn't "expect in Toronto" but lately meditation
has shown me new things...If anybody gets this driver - get his number
I want to ride with him again.

Listening to Ladytron
"Destroy everything you touch"

Sunday, January 14, 2007

What a glorious day...

Home made Eggs Benny, Darjeeling Tea, Fiest and Morning Snow - I am truly blessed to have all of this...

Plus sleeping on the floor has been soo good for me - i can't think of anything better - has the pinnacle been reached this morning? I don't know but this wave of peace flows deep...

Jesus replied, "Foxes have holes and birds have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head."
I brushed off this old sign last nite and it reminded me of the committment I made to live simply - it took over 6 years for this spoilt rich kid to go from no pillow to no bed and few possessions. But the journey was worth more than the destination.

I seriously can't wait for the next chapter to unveil itself.

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Simple Living is hard...

To live simple is mind tasking - I spent the early part of this morning unpacking my bags [finally!] and building furniture out of the wall guttin scraps.

Cooking was fun especially when all you have are 2 forks, 2 knives, 2 spoons, 2 bowls and 2 pots. It was a bit challenging but my funky old fashion gas stove made it feel like camping.

I made this cool angle shaped desk out of the closet door and my ibook feels very homey on it...plus it was fun to build and rip apart things...i have a deeper connection to this place.

However I realized that I have wayyyy to many books and tooo much clothes - I stood in shock when I realized I owned 4 pairs of shoes and 4 scarfs!
What the fuck do I do with 4 scarfs? This is the problem I have when I get too attached to things > 2 are from darjeeling and those make me feel good, one is knitted gift from a friend and my orange kengsiton market scarf really feels like an extension off my body.

I can't believe I am going to meditate about what to with my scarfs and other stuff.

God really help me.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Top Ten - Okay one section "Top Music"

I get an email everyday 2-3 days asking me "Where in the world is the top ten" ??" I thought it was coming out weeks ago..."
Yes I thought so as well - but then life took over and never stopped...

So after Little Lisa's comment I decided to post some of it in stages and [lengthing them for fun] - because just like my life - it's all a work in progress. Enjoy.

7. Music
It was nice to hear that Canadian indie went mainstream and that every band in Montreal had their own tour bus - In Asia all they play is Jack Johnson and James Blunt!!
[Suspiciously Nelson B.C. was doing the same] So it's cool to listen to something different...

Best Albums - Justin Timberland - Sexy back | Emily Haines and the Soft Skeleton

My fave new artists -
Explosions in the Sky [if you close your eyes they really do sound like explosions in the sky!]
The Books [awesome awesome website] | Knaan

Best musical guru -My friend Dan is high fidelity - he knows it all and would kick serious ass on Music Jeopardy. He recommended: Royal City - and I loved it. Email him your likes and dislikes and he can hook you up with good indie music.

Fave Songs: Hypocrisy runs deep in these two selections but both sides of the coin are foreign.

Split the Earth - Delirious? - this 10 year old love song struck a deep chord with me since arriving in Canada. Who/What splits your earth?
Here is a free download [Until I get a letter telling me to stop spreading the love...]

Take a bow - Muse - this song has been superstitiously absent from the mainstream media [MTV + Big Brother = a distracted happier Red Bull Gen Nex ] but it's a bold step for a huge rock band to take.

Best Music Moment: Nelly furtado – Loose
After 8 months of absolutely no new Canadian music. I needed a fix, so I picked up this mp3 at Boom Boom Room [the chairs are outdoors!] in Siem Reap, grabbed a pedaled bicycle and started to head away from civilization. 3hrs later I ended up in some rice paddy fields eating fried insects with kids.
The midday rains came and we all scattered > the rainy-solo-farmer shed-rice paddy scene was appropriate for some calming Nelly and my journal.
Listening to the first song I was like > this is Nelly? Is this a remix? What is this?
Whatever was playing was appropriate and eventually hammock swaying lead to feet moving and next thing I know I was doing for some mad Attitude rain dancing [I dance when no one is watching] – Damn. Fried insects could make a man do anything.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

24 and new place...

Late nite I got a chance to watch a sneak peek of 24. The first four
episodes felt like an entire season. I am still in shock it was worth
it.

I am also really glad that I watch only 1 tv show - I really don't
have time to watch anything else - unless I am with friends.

I love not owning a tv, a bed or any furniture - my new apartment just
has some a really cool colour scheme, nice hardwood floors and a some
high ceilings. Its nice to live simple.
My challenge is to have an Ikea free place, [because that company
seems to dominant houses] don't own any furniture over $10 and to
build whatever I need from scraps...

I even made a room for woodworking. Hilarity will follow I assure you.

Will post some pics soon
Jam

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Happy New Year everyone!

It's been a while since I posted anything and when the emails start rolling in... whereintheworldis that jam? > a post is usually in order.

Well I am alive and doing well. A new season bizarrely started this Jan - new seasons usually begin in May or Sept.

Some cool things>
I have a new place - which I can paint/decorate/smash it's been fun but tiring...
My parallel life friend from New Zealand gave me a call and helped me made some "big" decisions regarding my life - now I just have to meditate and put them in order...

Actually that's all the new "cool" things that have happened in the past while - I am sure that I forgot some...but more will present itself soon. My memory/world is full of em'

Happy New Year/Season to everyone and I will love to hear from you all soon.
Jam